Re: ONCE UPON A TIME, THERE WAS BUEA - BAMENDA

Ta Mfar, Indeed, that is the neighborhood where I had my baptism into
the noble teaching domain...and "boozing" too!!! Remembering EEC
Azire!!!
Martin

On 12/5/15, Suh-Nfor Tangyie <suhnfor@gmail.com> wrote:
> Tah Mfar,
> You have a pen Sar! This is much more lighter than your bullets with Rev.
> Awasom.
> It appears I used to loiter around this BB, perhaps as a Konto boozer. Late
> Prof. Asanji, Dr. Achu, Daddy Njomo, Mr. Tumban Aaron were the "grands".
> Ah, those were the days!
> On Dec 4, 2015 11:04 PM, "'Mishe Fon' via ambasbay" <
> ambasbay@googlegroups.com> wrote:
>
>> *Buea-Bamenda* was this famous bar situated at Hospital Round-About near
>> Preventive Medicine and former Bali and Mbengwi Motor Park.
>> *Buea-Bamenda*
>> or *BB* was neither a registered full-fledged Bar nor an off-license. It
>> was part "supermarket", provision store, matango house and three rooms 4
>> backside 4 CP. If you were not an insider, no one will tell you that the
>> facility had provision for that "specialized" activity. Booze flowed.
>> SOYA
>> was in abundance. Camaraderie was the order of the day but like most
>> drinking places, there were some konto drinkers who were accused of never
>> offering rounds. When it came to their turn, they would simply vamoose.
>> Konto boozers knew everyone. They had manyaka shweet mop. They were sleek
>> and smooth sales men without realizing their potential.
>>
>> What made *BB* so special and popular? Well several parameters including,
>> location, price of booze, the availability of numerous Bali, Baforchu,
>> Batibo, Banso and Babungo girls who were in hot competition with
>> "Nursing"
>> school girls sometimes spiced up with Longla, PCC, KTC, CCC, NACHO
>> experienced picken dem...and the Political discussions. I will focus here
>> on the politics of *BB* and *BB* chicks.
>>
>> If you wanted the latest on, Suffer Don Finish(SDF) or "Sudden Kamalloon
>> SCNC Ambazonia Movement" BB offered an abundance (in fact too much
>> information) and various conspiracy theories. The problem; No one was
>> supposed to contradict the narrative of the "story teller" who was always
>> quoting from "reliable sources". I remember on one occasion, I was
>> sipping
>> my "Porter 39" *soffre soffre* when Mr. Ambe *(a teacher with PCC
>> Mubang)*
>> said he had been reliably informed that the United Nations had just
>> granted
>> statehood to SC and the new President appointed by the UN was Ambassador
>> Fossung. The problem he continued (to the listening enjoyment of his
>> audience) is that when the document landed in Yaounde, Paul Biya just
>> grabbed the nonsense and "*tearam to pieces*". Dat Paul Biya yi head no
>> correct 4 inside?
>>
>> In my usual inquisitive mind, I asked him where he got such an outlandish
>> information, to which he replied:* "See me some ngnie man. Na bicos me na
>> you dey drink Mbuh for this Matango house wey you think say I be ya
>> class?
>> Look hia, I just kommot 4 Yawinde weh Mb'ya don put army sotey reach for
>> Sanaga bridge. I beg no make me I vex. Some thing wey I seeam with my
>> koro
>> koro eyes U kam dey ask me neeguisse. Listen, SC has been liberated and
>> elections will be held in two months*. No more no less.
>>
>> As you can imagine, the Political "Mbuh" pundits will debate on that
>> topic
>> for almost one week until they ran out of steam or arguments...then a new
>> guy will just materialize from Yaounde again with fresh "abracadabra"
>> Breaking News with analysis.
>> The beauty of* BB* was everyone and anyone could be seen there. I had met
>> dignitaries like Governor Aboem a Tchoyi, Governor Andela, Noko Mbella,
>> Colonel Tataw, Chien-man Fru Ndi, Ni Batonier Ben Muna, Dokta Tchwenko
>> and
>> other Bamendrous big names knacking their "Nduh" nayor nayor @ BB...No
>> questions asked.
>> As for the numerous women who "beautified" the place by their mere
>> presence; it was good for business. Women never bought drinks but some
>> ended up drinking more than the men who offered the "Nduh". The belief
>> then
>> was that, if a chick accepted your booze...then she was yours for the
>> evening. You then became the "Titulaire"...even 4 one Nite.
>>
>> The unwritten rule was that if Pa Ngwa Frutambo was the first to offer
>> the
>> "Nduh", then no other guy had the right to "counter-offer". For example;
>> women usually drank "Grenadine, Champagne soda or Top Anana, Pamplemousse
>> or any other cheap sweet concoction:. But when a guy showed any interest,
>> she will upgrade to a much more serious booze like Beaufort, 33 Export or
>> small Guiness. If another guy manifested any modicum of liking for the
>> same
>> "ngah", she will politely tell you (the new dragueur): *"Dat man 4 dey na
>> yi don buy me two botro Ngange. If you want, geep me Gold Harp then geep
>> back the man yi mimbo and I go tell yi say me na yi no dey again".
>> *Usually,
>> that arrangement worked flawlessly except on rare occasions like this
>> one.
>>
>> So this Bakossi guy who was working with SNEC had already assured his
>> "evening" by dishing out sotey two beers to this fine Bali woman. He knew
>> he had her under lock and key. He continued his political discussions
>> with
>> the rest of the group. Suddenly another friend whispered to him: *"U sure
>> say U don perm dat Bali mammie so? See, how she dey drink na high class
>> mimbo now Na you buy yi Gold Harp? Massa U get money oh"*. Furious, our
>> Bakossi friend walked up to "his Fiance" and said:
>> *"Mamoun, Njika ba-ghe, Tam 4 go don ket. Wuuk up make we go"*. To which
>> the Bali mammie replied *"I no dey me with you again. Na dis fain boy be
>> my new man"*. Na dey big FIGHT broke.
>>
>> The whole *Buea Bamenda* went in support of the Bakossi man claiming:
>> *"First
>> Come, First Served. You no fit drink man yi mimbo then begin dey play
>> Baforchu Mafia games. Either U back the man yi mimbo (with interest) or
>> you
>> go "service the guy". Why wuna Bali girls wuna wicked so? Wuna no fit
>> belleful one man? "* *And the girl with no shame will answer back:* *"I
>> don tell wuna say, me I like me na this other guy. Ih no dey trong hand
>> or
>> get Japanese Hand Brakes. Last time weh I go with this yeye Blakossi man,
>> na daso 500F CFA ih geep me 4 morning tam. Wuna think say ih correct so?
>> I
>> no go buy chop 4 pikin dem? I no go buy soap 4 wash body, Nku cream or
>> baby
>> pancake? See me some crisse man. Dat yi stupid office 4 "Snake' dem no
>> dey
>> pay yi 4 moon die?*
>>
>> At the end of the day, everything was settled amicably and everyone went
>> home happy.
>> Story long tam short. For the rest of the langua, call me privately for
>> updates on how *Buea Bamenda* eventually became a big Transportation
>> company with branches in Limbe, Kumba, Muyuka, Douala and Yaounde.
>>
>> Tah Mfar Mishe Fon
>>
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