Fw: IN A LIGHTER MOOD: CPDM WOMEN REBEL AGAINST THEIR MEN

A Container Business Shipper to Cameroon posted this warning to its clientele:

I deliberately decided to take a break off campaigning for "Nimoh Clean Thing" in Philly, Richmond and Virginia Beach all last week and I decided to kam me back home to reality i.e knack familiar langua 4 dat we kontri 4 tok plaba Ngola. So, I read this "Ad" from one of our Container Business Guys and it triggered this legitimate reaction. I hope it makes you abandon the real and perceived vitriol that has characterized the American elections thus far in the Cameroonian community. Guess what? Neither massa "Trumpeur" Donald nor nimoh "Clean Thing" cares one hoot whether Mishe whatever Fon spent his own monies to travel to these places on their behalf. My strong Mendankwe accent even turned off some potential Hillary Independent leaning voters. Dat campaign this year dey as ih dey.

NB: Read to the end.

PROHIBITED ITEMS

The following items are prohibited by the Cameroonian Government and therefore we do not ship them:

• Cooking oil
• Water
• Alcoholic drinks
• Non alcoholic beverages
• Fertilizers
• Paper products
• Certain Food items
• Military equipment. 
• 
  
• Hectic and draconian fines/penalties are levied by Customs and other Ministerial departments if such items are found in your package.

Here is my problem with this:

Other than Afofo, Har, Akembe Federale, Majunga, Ogogoro, Kuran Patashi, Shah, Nkang, Kwacha, Tumbu Likwor; where else does Cameroon excel in the manufacture and production of "Local Wines"? Brasseries du Cameroun is a FRENCH company owned by the CASTEL family. The few indegenous breweries had a bismal performance that the French as usual came and "took back their business". So why would Cameroon restrict importation of even small quantities of popular brands like Chivas, Hennessey, Johnny, Baileys, Mast Jagermeister, Smirnoff, Crown Royal, Jack Daniels, Bacardi Superior, Captain Morgan, Grand Manier, Cointreau etc

The idea here is not to criticize local production but it beats me that a country that has not encouraged or facilitated local entreneurship in various domains in Manufacture has the guts to penalize a few "smoogri abriba buy one take two traders" who are simply "trying their garri in debrouillardises" to make ends meet. The problem with banning anything is that if fuels the appetite of the consumers and that is why all those "Interdit Items" are found every where in Cameroon. Ins't that a paradox? The President himself has never put "Afofo" in his mouth since he gulps only the most expensive Vodkas and vintage wines from accredited world renown wineries.

Here is just one aspect where the Government indirectly encourages irresponsible behaviour by "Officially Banning and Officially condoning to the extent  when the "Kako" arrives Douala, you take a few US Dollars and Euros (not CFA) and "cover" the eyes of prying Customs Officers, who then look to the left while the "Marchandises" is whisked to the right for various destinations in the country. That is one reason Cameroon will never progress as almost all of us are small or big time SMUGGLERS 4 we blood (Yes oh!! Most of us in the Diaspora are directly or indirectly potential smugglers). Take even two Container Load of "banned" Hennessey or Dimples and notice how you will be the first to clear Customs formalities "If the price is right".

So, simple question: Why impose a Ban or a Fine on a product that everybody wants and uses. Even those CPDM mammies who have been used as Political puns and co-conspirator scapegoats all these years have now graduated from drinking "33" Export, Castel, Beaufort to "Je veux moi-aussi boire le bon vin Americain et Italien et le whiskie condom que les jeunes appellent partout ici dehors que: "Fais moi sentir le munyong". The women conclude their rebellion aganst their Chop People Dem Money Party with  the proverbial "Some Woman na Ngrung Beep? Plus question que vous nous tromper avec des petites bieres Camerounaises et les pains charges alors que vous, vous trinquez les vraies choses. A partir de  2017 jusqu'a jusqu'a; meme sep mon "Ndombolo et jolies Lolos" ne seront plus utilises "NJOH" pour faire plaisir aux dignitaires qui veulent satisfaire leurs fantasmes et rituelles nocturnes pendant les campagnes electorales.

Vraiement de Dieu, vous nous prenez comme quoi meme? Surtout les Njimtetes Ewondos du Centre et les Bulus d'Ebolowa, Sangmelima et Zoetele. Ou c'est le Viagra dosage double + 5Hr Energy ou le kangkang Kuran Tashi mangani kanda sitick qu'ils consomment,, je n'en sais rien mais ils aiment tous "Le Long Courier". Quant aux patrons RDPCiste Anglophones, la alors c'est le lock-mop". Rien que le Grammar de London que le mbom vas te lancer quand tu veut fermer l'oeil un peu, suffit pour te fatiguer meme avant et apres. Tu vas entendre les conneries comme "What is the per-capita ratio of fees charged in juxtaposition to services rendered?" Mi nal mi Bebele zambwa wam, Vois moi quelqu'un. C'est qui ca? Le njimtete Anglos-ci crois que j'etais a Buea avec lui? Salade.  

Maintenant comme disent nos soeurs Anglophones de Baminda" "Money 4 Hand, Back Touch Down" L'epoque ou le RDPC nous abusait le "Tue Merci don bole from. La bonne sauce a besoin de condiments. Encore nos soeurs du cote anglophones via Foumban disent que "Good Soup, na Money cookam" Avant d'aller dans les meetings de ce Party, on vas dorenavant negocier les contrats. Contrats pour applaudisement. Contrats pour se mettre en route; Contrats si le gratage de dos + jouissance corporel rai partie du "Marche". YES: Business is Business and this is Business. No Ifs No Buts.

Mishe Tah Mfar